Weigh Day (week twenty)

Welcome to another weekly edition of “Weigh Day.”  I am having some serious emotional ups and downs today (not related to weighing in, though), so I am thankful to be meeting with my trainer this afternoon.  Hopefully she will work me *hard* and I can momentarily mute my mind.

On the weigh in front, though, life is good.  No, life is grand.  I weighed in this morning at 258.4, which is a 3.2 pound loss from last week.  This brings my total to 56.6 pounds, and I could not possibly be happier about that.  It is truly wonderful to get results…consistently.  That is a true affirmation to all the hard work I have been putting in (day in, day out).

Here is an interesting experience I had yesterday, though.  I was out with some family (Holiday shopping), and we stopped for lunch at Frisch’s.  They had *very* little on the menu that I would even consider eating, so I began asking the waitress questions.  My questions were not absurd (I do not think so anyway).  I asked things like, “What is this grilled chicken breast cooked in?” and “Do you have 100% whole wheat/grain bread?”  The waitress looked at me like I sprouted another head – right there in the middle of the restaurant.  Then her reply was something like this, “I don’t know what it’s cooked in, why?”  Maybe I read too much into her inflection (or the horrible look she shot at my *body* – but I immediately felt defensive.  So, here was my reply back, “Well, I *know* it seems funny that a fat girl is so inquisitive about what everything is cooked in, but this fat girl was 56 pounds fatter just four months ago.  So, that is why I am asking.”  She never even went to find out what the damn chicken was cooked in, by the way.  I ordered it anyway (and a salad).  I barely ate the salad because it just did not taste right (not sure what in the world they put on the thing…not dressing, mind you).  I did eat the chicken breast, but nothing else.  I left the restaurant starving (and without leaving a tip…in case you were wondering).

People are *so* quick to judge others.  I experience that quite often.  Not only because of my weight, but because of my hair and tattoos.  Especially when I have my daughters with me.  People just assume that I must be a horrible mother/role model because of my appearance.  It fascinates me, honestly.  I try very hard to avoid judging others based on anything other than character, which is something you cannot tell by looking at someone.  I wish more people considered what others were *really* like – beyond their size, hair color, skin color (cause we all know *that* is still a big one), or anything else superficial.  If only…

Have you ever experienced some kind of discrimination for your weight (or any other superficial reason)?  How did you respond?

-Erica

7 responses to “Weigh Day (week twenty)

  1. What a lousy way for the waitress to behave. I just checked their website, which does not list nutritional information. Safe to say you made the right choice to leave hungry, but it is a special kind of torture to have an experience like that.

    I did have one boss who clearly became more and more uncomfortable around me and judgmental of me as I gained weight. It showed up in my performance reviews. I quit working for her as soon as I could find another job. Sadly, she seems like someone who has struggled with eating disorders herself.

    I’ve had all kinds of assumptions about whether I am (or should be) on a diet, often from waitresses. And you must have the salad? No, the steak is mine, the salad is for my husband, and we’ll take the snide comments to go, thank you very much. It surprises me when wait staff act that way – surely they realize it affects their tip?!

    • You would think they would realize comments like that do affect their tip…apparently not, though. People that feel entitled (or even appreciated?) by making those unsolicited comments/assumptions just confuse me. How is my weight/food choice any of their business? Last time I checked, my life (and my weight) is my own, not anyone else’s. Right? I would *never* take it upon myself to make such an inappropriate comment/suggestion/assumption about anyone else. Some people…

      -Erica

  2. Congrats on your big loss this week! I hate when restaurants make it difficult for you to stick with your plan. I don’t blame you for not leaving a tip and your questions were *so very* normal. People who mind don’t matter and people who matter don’t mind. Your life and your weight IS your own and no one else’s and THAT’s SO empowering and I think that’s what threatens others who either sabotage or stand in our way! The worst one is when someone says nothing! Almost as if they don’t know what to say? Jealous?

    YOU GO GIRL! We ARE going to make it! I weighed in this morning almost exactly at the same weight as you. (258.2)! Loss of 23.8 in 10.5 weeks! What is your final goal number? Is it based on your height? Or how you feel most comfortable? I’m curious. Mine is 180. I started this time at 282. So 78.2 to go for me! Yay for you and me and all who have success in this battle! Food addiction is real and we will win!

    • I have only had two people comment on my weight loss unprompted. Those two people were genuinely happy for me – you can just tell. The other people usually do not comment until a conversation can lead that direction…when I talk about my gym or my trainer or foods I have tried recently, etc. Then they usually say something like, “Oh, yeah, you look good.” Not with the “I’m really happy for you” inflection in their voice, though. It is usually more like, “Great, you’re losing weight – how wonderful” sarcastic tone they have. Whatever. I also chalk that up to jealousy. Everyone else is wondering what “magic” thing I am doing/trying…and how I *must* be “cheating” or getting “help” from someone/something. Nope – just good old fashioned sweat and hard work…and healthy eating. 🙂

      To be honest, I am not sure what my “final” goal number is. When I was 15 or 16 I felt comfortable with my size (more so than any other time in my life). I was wearing a 14/16 and weighed around 185(ish). So, maybe somewhere around there…but I figure when I get “there” – I’ll know it. LOL – I don’t desire to be in a single digit size. I know my body is not built for that. I have no need/want to be the thinnest girl in the room or have people “oohing and aahing” over me and how thin I am. I just want to be healthy and fit…whatever size/weight that ends up being will be fine with me. 🙂

      -Erica

  3. I had a humiliating type experience at my family Thanksgiving meal. 😦 Apparently my family is all concerned about my weight and talk about it behind my back. My grandfather actually made a comment about what I had on my plate. I know I need to get back on the ball with my weight loss. What are you doing to lose weight? Do you have a specific plan? Any help would be greatly appreciated.

    • TyeDye,
      I do not have a specific plan, per se, that I am following. I have reduced my serving sizes (to a normal/actual portion), and I have reduced my sweets intake (cake, candy, etc.). Beyond that, the biggest change to the actual foods I am eating is that I have given up *all* regular white breads and pastas. I switched to 100% whole grain/wheat breads and pastas. Doing that has really made a difference in my eating habits. I find I crave sweets less and that I generally feel better (and that was before I lost a bunch of weight). I am a firm believer that one plan is not for everyone. All people are different and are willing to change/sacrifice different things to accomplish goals. My best advice would be to be *real* with yourself about what you can/will do, and make sure your goals are small and attainable (the quicker, the better). Start small with a goal to walk more (park further away from work/store, use the stairs instead of an elevator, etc.) each week. When you accomplish that you’ll feel great and be ready to tackle another small goal. The more often you allow yourself to succeed, the more excited and motivated you will become to set more challenging goals (and meet them) in the future. I hope that helps you…but I’m no expert. 🙂

      Thanks for stopping by!
      -Erica

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